You’re will never, ever win a medal in the Olympics, let alone 4047 of them like Michael Phelps. On the bright side, NB just released these gold and silver 576 kicks, with which you can fake medaling instead of putting in years of hard work. You can grab them at your sneak boutique or newbalance.com.

By the way, Bob Costas went over Michael Phelps’ training regimen the other day. That killer whale has serious caloric needs. Check out his typical breakfast order from Pete’s Grill in Baltimore:

“…Three sandwiches of fried eggs, cheese, lettuce, tomato, fried onions and mayonnaise, add one omelet, a bowl of grits, and three slices of french toast with powdered sugar, then wash down with three chocolate chip pancakes.”